Let's Talk About The End...

Let’s Talk About the End

Let’s be honest—talking about death isn’t exactly the go-to topic over a cup of tea. But maybe it should be.

Not in a gloomy, doom-and-gloom kind of way, but in a thoughtful, loving, even celebratory way. After all, we spend so much time planning birthdays, weddings, and holidays—why not give a little thought to how we’d like our lives to be remembered when the time comes?

It’s not morbid. It’s meaningful.

Why Talk About It?

Imagine this: your loved ones, in the midst of grief, trying to guess what songs you liked, whether you wanted a church service, or a secular service, or a woodland burial, or if you’d prefer daffodils over lilies. It’s a lot to ask of people at a difficult time. By having the conversation now, you’re giving a gift. You’re lifting a burden. You’re saying, “Here’s how I’d like to be celebrated.” And yes—celebrated. Because a funeral or memorial service isn’t just about mourning a loss; it’s about honouring a life.

What to Talk About

So, what should you include in this chat with your nearest and dearest? Here are a few gentle prompts to get you started:

·       Where would you like the ceremony to be held? Church, crematorium, garden, beach?

·       What kind of tone do you want? Quiet and reflective, joyful and full of stories, or a mix?

·       

Any favourite readings, poems, or hymns? Maybe something that made you laugh or cry.

·       Music choices? From Bach to The Beatles, it’s your call.

·       Would you like people to wear black, or something bright and cheerful?

·       Flowers or donations to a charity close to your heart?

·       Burial, cremation, or something else? There are more options than you might think.

·       And finally—what do you want people to remember most about you? That’s the heart of it.

Even a few notes or a casual chat over Sunday lunch can make a world of difference.

Celebrants: Personal, Compassionate, Local

If you’re not sure where to begin, or if you’d prefer something outside of a traditional church service, a celebrant might be just what you need.

Celebrants are trained professionals who work with families to create ceremonies that reflect the personality, values, and wishes of the person who has died. Whether the service is at the crematorium, in a village hall, a garden, or even a favourite walking spot, celebrants make it personal.

They’ll sit down with you, listen to stories, ask thoughtful questions, and help shape a ceremony that feels right. It can be spiritual, secular, or somewhere in between. It can include music, poetry, laughter, tears, and even a toast.

Locally, we’re lucky to have Jackie and Deb from Just Ceremonies—two compassionate, experienced celebrants who are known for their warmth, sensitivity, and attention to detail. They’ll guide you through the process gently, making sure every element of the ceremony feels supportive and meaningful.

Jackie and Deb don’t just “do a service”—they help create a moment of connection, healing, and remembrance. Families often say how comforting it is to have someone who truly listens and makes space for what matters most.

Start the Conversation

If you’re not sure how to begin, try something like:

“I read something recently about planning your own funeral. It got me thinking—have you ever thought about how you’d like yours to be?”

Or:

“I’ve been putting together a few ideas for my memorial service. Want to hear them?”

You might be surprised how relieved people are to talk about it. It’s not just about your wishes—it’s about theirs too.

A Loving Legacy

Talking about the end isn’t about being morbid. It’s about being mindful. It’s about love, clarity, and kindness. It’s about making sure your story is told the way you want it to be. 

So go on—put the kettle on, gather your thoughts, and start the conversation. It might just be one of the most meaningful chats you ever have.